Tuesday, August 25, 2015
It has been long since I posted a thankful note, some where I drifted with the flow!!
I am thankful for my god, for his plans for me, for his love that grows with each passing day
For the hardships coming our way that test us, stretch us, and make us pursue our goals with lot more vigor and fire!!
I have tenderly embraced his love, his existence
I know God cares for me, for all of us,
because his love wafts in our surroundings, in the daily miracles that i happen to see!!
Around here-Calming my mind
Immersed in silent contemplation, thinking about life in general, my course, motherhood, and what's coming ahead!! Like the weather outside, my semblance also seems to be soggy, muggy !! may be it is the effect of the weather, can be!! After all I tend to gravitate towards nature, It definitely affects my selfhood, my epseity!!
I feel I am not doing a great job of documenting 365 days of Vihaan, well it's not*- that this feeling is recent, it keeps happening to me ever so often, sporadically, I go down the hill!! why?? because mind (brain) is never at rest..... thinking all the time...or to put it precisely...it's on auto thinking mode....made up of some billion of neurons, that are ever so excitable, working tirelessly, transmitting impulses (Thoughts) among each other...some times excited...sometimes sad....sometimes pepped up...transmitting signals effectively....sometimes delayed and bit laid back...but working 24/7!!
so while I am in this auto thinking mode, Vihaan is playing nearby, busy with his toys but also checking on me every few minutes...and smiling.... intoxicating my senses with his loveliness !!
I close my eyes...try to free calm my mind, my neurons for a brief time period, I chose to sit in the Padma asana (Lotus pose) and I bring my palm together, in the Namaskar pose, thanking almighty, the supreme lord, for the sanity still left in me, for the hope that is baffled but persistent in the existence...submersed in the gratitude surrounded the cool air by the continuously rotating ceiling fan, that sets the otherwise still air in the room into the motion, housed by the walls painted in the shade of chrysanthemum 4002, I feel a light tug at my right elbow, it's Vihaan, I open my eyes and for a brief moment I feel disoriented...Vihaan is looking at me with curious face...he has not seen me like this before, i know I am done for the day :)
Sun is setting, far far away, in the valley... the cattles may have come back by themselves..
it is a warm evening and both of us are pleasantly tired with our day long chores, I fill the Vihaan's bathing tub with cool fresh water, he gently and happily immerses his right foot into the cool clear water, I see the visible excitement on his face and I pray
May he always be a happy chirpy soul!!
Monday, August 24, 2015
Friday, August 21, 2015
This was the best ever photo shoot, I was setting the camera on timer mode, and then just cuddling you and going to the spot for the click...we did it 7-8 times, and after 3-4 time, you started to rush to the spot giggling all the way, waiting for me to join you!! it was a fun game for you and for me it was a priceless memory that I captured here!!
That I will cherish for years to come....Love you!!
Wednesday, August 19, 2015
Monday, August 17, 2015
Sunday, August 16, 2015
Saturday, August 15, 2015
Friday, August 14, 2015
Messy hair diary:
Imagine this: you got to go out, everything is ready and perfect and you are all set to shine but then you look at your hair, all messy, frizzy, unruly, euuuuhh!! That’s my story, it has always been that way since my yester years but lately after delivery and this journey into motherhood, it has become all the more grubby, disheveled, and to be honest enough, I haven’t tended to them also, I haven’t cared enough, no oiling, no proper conditioning, nothing much!! Hmmm where is the time to do all that…I comb them, well that seems enough. I have been thinking of possible solution to my messy hair story, questioning and counter questioning all in my mind:
Let’s go for a haircut?
We can but what if it turns out to be utter disaster, makes it even more unmanageable, what will I do then?? no let’s consider other options first.
Ok, the how about hair straightening/smoothing therapy?
A) it’s expensive and
B) They are going to apply so many smelly chemicals on my head, and the aftercare is heck!! just too much,
so a big NOOO,
hair straightening/smoothing therapy
What are my options here?? a bit of care, oiling, and conditioning, can work wonders, let’s try that first….it will not happen overnight i know, A lot of care and disciplined regimen is what I need for now!! after all I have no other choice !!
And while I have come to the end of this post, I have convinced Akash to give me a coconut oil head massage ;) so got to go :)
Have a happy weekend!!
Empty spaces, hollow voices, sweat beads crumpled on my upper lip and very uneasy restless me! That’s who I am lately!! Ever since I have returned from Kashmir.... I wake up unrefreshed from my sleep, for many hours I am insomniac and if at all I fall asleep then it is light and disturbed!!
Everyday I open my laptop to write something but the moment I start, I feel the coldness of my fingers freezing the words , not letting them flow free, they leave the fingers and loose their essence midway, rendering the thoughts lifeless, meaningless!!
With disappointment I close the flap and retire to my couch, staring back again in the empty spaces, trying to listen to the hollow voices!! I will bounce back I know, sooner or later, it’s just a phase I tell myself!! And I wipe away the beads of sweat from my upper lip!!