What is life?

Tonight, as I write this post, I hear the clinking of the spoon in the kitchen, Akash is brewing coffee for me, It was a request from me for a cup of hot coffee... 

This clicking sound takes me far deeper in my thoughts, and I think, what is life?

It is being born

Being loved my your family

Making friends

falling in love

having to undergo heart breaks

sulking about being treated unfairly

Falling in love again

dreaming of a future

setting up  goals

working hard for achieving your goal

then realizing that not all your goals were realistic

feeling depressed

getting married

those initial years when love is in the air :)

having a baby

then everything about the baby, all the time baby baby  baby

ouch! occasional skirmishes over the baby

Well, that's what is happening in here right now ;)

My coffee is brewed and absolutely ready...I am going to gulp it down, lie in the arms of my sweetheart, close my eyes, and stop the tape that is playing out in my head, that says, "what is life? :)

Good night!!

My 32nd Birthday

I turned 32 on November 8th. My friend Jo (Josna), (yep, that's what I call her now) gave me a wonderful surprise party. She arranged for a yummy cake, did all the decorations secretly at her place and then called me up on 3rd November to her apartment, I along with Vihaan went there as usual casually, and then what I saw just touched my heart, balloons, lighting, cakes, and music....I did wet my eyes, I was happy and at the same time also touched by her sweet gesture.

I had to leave for Jammu on 4th Nov, so she gave me surprise beforehand. 

some relationship's are just meant to be, no matter from where you are? or what are you are? when it click...it clicks..right? yes, that what is between two of us.

Spending time with her is the wonderful thing, at times we don't talk much about ourselves, it's just Kids and kids, but still it feel good to be together.

Thanks Jo for this gesture, I will cherish it for the lifetime, and I am saving it here in my blog forever!

Where am I??

I wake up to the comfort of a familiar surroundings, Lofty wind pushes it way inside the room and fills me with a sense of calmness and comfort!! I am wide awake ....and happy for being that way!!

Earth is rotating slowly to complete one full rotation around the sun, and I am completely unaware about the rotation because I don't feel it anyway, I am too busy marveling at the beauty all around me, too happy to a part of it even though I know that it's not my reality anymore, that as the earth will keep rotating around the sun making days and nights and before I know , My day will be looking at me directly into the eye and mumbling, "it's time to go".

and even though i will pack my stuff with heavy heart,  get my luggage x-rayed for any potential threat to the airport authorities, take a boarding pass for the flight to Mumbai, a "PREEMINENT" part of my heart will always be in Kashmir, wandering in the wilderness, getting awaken by the crisp morning breeze every day...

I will always love you with the deepest core of my heart!!

Akash's 32nd Birthday!!

My best buddy turned 32 on 20th June!! The best part of marrying your friend is that you never realize that you are getting old, while years come and go just so fast!!

Our day started with a nice and hearty breakfast for Akash served with beautiful fresh flowers ;), then the much awaited Cake cutting, this time I ordered a Chocolate ice-cream roll cake and now that has become our fav, we absolutely love it!! and finally a Photo shoot!! 

I am waiting eagerly for Vihaan to grow up and be my charming companion in planning for occasions like these,it will be so much fun doing things together, going market, making plans, and shopping!!

Kahwa and flax seeds tea and my learning today!!

It was a great day….I felt so energetic, so refreshed and full of life…why?? Because of many things:

Firstly I woke up at 7 rather than 9 which I usually do….I used my handmade soap for shower  and I felt so good… I thought I am so happy to see my creation put to good use…than won’t god be happy to see his creation (that’s me) so happy today…he will be thinking what a beautiful creation is this soul…so happy so cheerful, full of love, exactly the way i wanted it to be!! That’s what I actually thought!!

Secondly I read few chapters from the “Book of Woman” while sipping my fav Kashmiri Kahwa tea… (Infusion of kahwa leaves, cinnamon, saffron, and sugar) with 2 teaspoons of flax seeds…!! Adding the seeds was a new twist in the usual tea…why?? because:

Power packed flax seeds have a nutty taste…they are a source of omega-3 and omega-6, rich source of lignin, that’s flushes out the excess oestrogen from body reducing chances of oestrogen linked cancers like breast cancer. 

( Note: They should be crushed before use otherwise they will pass through the body just like that…once crushed they should be refrigerated because the oil  in the seeds will be oxidized thereby diminishing their nutritive value).

And thirdly:

I gifted Josna one homemade soap J, we had our casual discussion about life, how things should be actually and how we mistakenly perceive them to be…how life should move on, how our relationships should be…it is always refreshing to have such discussions with her… and every time we end up learning a thing or two…embracing the beauty of life’s mysteries with open arms !!

Our most valuable treasure- Our Relationships!!

If you have a plant at home… you won’t just keep it all decked up in the balcony or in some corner of the house…It's not about mere possession... rather you will ensure that you take best care of it, you will take appropriate steps for its survival and then it’s continued healthy growth… for that you need to know it well because different plants have different requirements…what goes for one won’t go for everyone. You will make sure it gets proper lighting, just right amount of water, sufficient nutrients, proper handling, adequate air circulation…you will dedicate your daily scheduled time for its well being, isn't it??!!

 Well, same goes for our relationships also…they also need our time, our support, our understanding to grow and bloom!! and  the sooner we get it the better it is, because, deep down...oblivious to the naked eyes.. if the root dies, the plant will wilt away too..if the impact is deeper, than nothing you do superficially will save it from dying away...!!!

it is the root, that nourishes the whole plant, that anchors it to the soil, that stimulates the growth...and root is deep down...undergoing a lot, all by itself..!! 

Lesson learned Over the cup of spilled tea!!

Today both of us (Vihaan and I) were in the kitchen, I was busy making my tea and Vihaan as usual was keeping me company….Even though I try my best to pay full attention to Vihaan, I also try to finish up a multitude of things that are pending …and today in all this mess I kept my steaming hot cup just on the edge of the kitchen counter and I went to check on the washing machine and in the fraction of a second Vihaan got hold of the cup and before I could stop him the tea came pouring down  on his hand and arm…he cried… I caught hold of him, took him to the washroom and immersed his arm in the water…

Thankfully it was not severe…it took him 10 minutes to come out of it…he was okay and he  forgot what had just happened… he forgot... and he forgave me…for not being mentally present, for messing up…he forgave me…even though he was truly hurt…he forgave me easily…perhaps he knew that this hurt was small and is going to heal with time… I was feeling guilty...I was in unrest but my little boy was calm, composed and he resumed playing, he gave me smile...and I thought how  bigger heart this boy of mine has!! Probably bigger than me!! Because I know I am not that forgiving !!

 How difficult we grown-ups find it to forgive someone and how easily kids do it!!

It was a lesson learned…to let go of the hurt because it is going to heal with time anyway.. if there is something that we should hold on to, then its Love, faith and forgiveness!!

38/365 and Mother's Day celebration!!

38/365

We had a great motherhood celebration here, it was fun, photos, giggles and lots of running around!! 

I did a mother’s day photo shoot with some of my Mommy friends and their adorable babies, will upload pics soon!!

Thanks to akash for this great idea of photo shoot, it was his suggestion that i should do something with my friends today and here I am with the wonderful pictures!!

Two proud Mommy’s J

Photography credit for some of the pictures goes to a wonderful mommy "Ayesha"!!

Mother's day, an awakening and a surprise!!

Being a mother is...

Well it's more than words can explain...I don't know how to put it in words....I  wish i could get into the time machine and go to my yesteryear's and be little more sensible..I wish I could see the world through the eyes of my mother at that stage in life and I wish I could understand what she meant and felt when I made silly mistakes. ..when I was unnecessary rude to her for trivial things...I wish I could change that...but I can't, it's too late in life...but I can tell her now that I love her and genuinely understand what a "mother"  is and I appreciate everything that she has done for me !!

My Mother day gift to my Mother and Mother in law was a  surprise "prepaid mobile recharge" with full talk time  for both of them :)  ...and I know from the conversation that i had with them,  they were bit surprised and also happy at the same time...I have never done anything before on the mother's day, (I know..sounds so rude, but it's true) ...so it came as a total surprise...well It's just the beginning, an awakening for me and I will definitely continue this tradition!!

Sharing a message, straight from the heart…

The template is from Textcutie and quote is mine!!

May be I am crazy...but I am happy!!

Well that's what happy people do, happy people are bit rebellious, they are bit different, bit wired, they care less about what others might be thinking of them...they go an extra mile , they ask questions, they never hesitate for asking what they want even if others think that it might sound silly...they take out time to do what they love...they are always on the move...they listen to their heart!!

Ok you might be thinking that I am crazy, maybe I am...because I am happy...I never hesitate for asking the guy at the ice cream parlour to put some extra chocolate on my  ice-cream cone...and he smiles and put it happily...I never care what people will think when I take off my sandals and jump in the stream of water in the local park...and kids watch me and they do the same... they jump in with joy...I know that I have shared my happiness with them...

I never hesitate in asking a local vegetable vendor why is he grumpy, is it because he had a bad day...well I wish whatever it is, it will be taken care by god...I know by saying so I have shared his pain as well...must have made him feel a little better if not much!!

I do what i feel like, I live in the moment!! 

May be I am crazy...but I am happy!!

Welcoming May

May this month of May be filled with happiness, lots of good learning and plenty of memories to treasure!!

May it nurture the good in all of us and help us to be a better human being!!

Today-liberated me

When I woke up this morning ,I felt better...much lighter..and like any other usual morning my mind was up and It had already made a to-do list for the day ahead, and was in a planning mode, on the execution, while I was still wrapped up in my sheets...Even though my Mind was already on the working mode, body was not ready to get up and get going, it was asking for a snooze button, for 5 more minutes...so i listened to my body.

My thoughts drifted to my last night's post, "feeling lost", I know it was all complains...but then again, i have to be honest to my space here...it has to be real me, and I must confess I too have my weak moments...i too go down hill some days...become too self centered at times... but then It's not in my fiber to be like that for long...I vent out, I complain and I move on...

 I am learning, learning to have a bigger heart...learning to accept things gracefully, learning to let go easily..to not focus on "I" all the time, rather on "us", it's like playing Hopscotch square, You hop from square to square tossing the stone without touching the boundaries and if you do so, you are out, you loose it...

Similarly At times you lose your patience while dealing with day to day issues and when you do so, you break down, but then you should not stop just there, you should try again, yearn for a better performance next time without losing your patience!!

That's me...honest me...and today -liberated me :)

I am thankful :)

I am thankful to God for giving me such good parents!!

Now that I am parents myself, I can understand that it is not a cakewalk, it requires a lot of patience, lots of love, understanding, and at times compromises as well...

I am thankful that my parents raised me the best way they could, gave me quality life, quality education, many good memories, and love in life!!

I love both of them :) from the core of my heart!!

I am thankful :)

I am so thankful for Cameras, without a camera how would I capture and save so many beautiful memories, such great stories, so much love...!!

I am Thankful :)

You are a beautiful thing my precious, you are my part, born out of my flesh and bones, my essence, you have the best of us, me & your father.  

I see you and I crumble like a freshly baked cookie,

I melt like butter in a pan, I dissolve like a drop of ink in the water jar, I diffuse like lemony scent in the air.

 I feel delighted, I feel elated, I tell myself "Such a beautiful thing we made out of love"...

I see you smile & I feel as if I seen a rainbow after a storm.I see you giggling & I feel as if hundred of wind chimes are dancing with the early morning breeze.

When you get hurt I feel a flutter in my heart.

You are pure joy in our life!!

I am thankful for being your mother.

PS: I have been creating these "Thankful" graphics with the help of Photofy, today I used TextCutie as well.

I am thankful :)

February is my fav month of the year, Valentine's day, Wedding Anniversary and because of 28 days you get Salary early as well ;)

Wedding Anniversary-4th year

Fourth year... and it feels as if I have been with you from ages, feels like I had to be with you only and no one else, feels inseparable...

Look how beautiful memories we made yesterday,  I see these pictures and I fall in love with you all over again... 

I had been planning for this photo shoot from quiet some time,I had been shopping online for our special outfits... taking time everyday... meticulously choosing our accessories, your bow tie, my white dress...the props..

 I had planned that we won't go out for a lunch, or dinner or just for a cup of coffee, we won't go out for shopping, we will stay at home and make some good memories over a cup of ordinary yet Sapid tea made by you ;), we will spend some exceptional time at home,  after all home is where my heart is, where you are , where my family is..


We spent close to some 2-3 hours in our photo shoot, tripod photography, it was like throwing a ball from one end and running to the other end to catch it...but we enjoyed, every shot, every click, every chase ;)

I love you my dear darling husband and I wish to be with you till the end of time, for I have planned many many more, crazy, wacky, funny, loving photo shoots with you for years to come...

Here's to our 4 years of togetherness as Husband & wife....cheers!!

PS:Photography credit goes to my husband Akash, and also to our tripod ;)for it wouldn't have been possible without you !!

Special Thanks to the "Wellness team" Akash's team at office for the scrumptious, heavenly, mouthwatering cake!!  It was a great surprise and we absolutely loved it :)!!